Category Archives: FUN n TP

Saturday Mornings! #lol

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Saturday morning!

I got up early, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed my golf bag, tried not to wake my wife, sneaked quietly into the garage and proceeded to back out into a torrential down pour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.

Disappointed I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and sneaked back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, ‘The weather out there is terrible.’

My loving wife of 20 yrs replied, ‘Can you believe my stupid husband is out there playing golf in that terrible weather?’

I still don’t know to this day if she was joking, but I have stopped playing golf.

Secret of a Married life

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Once I was asked by my Friend, “What is the secret behind your happy married life?”

I said, “You should share responsibilities with due love and
Respect each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems.”

He asked, “Can you explain?”

I said, “In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each others decisions.”

Still not convinced, Friend asked me “Give me some examples”

I said,” Smaller issues like, which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator , monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are decided by my wife. I just agree to it”

He asked, “Then what is your role?”

I said,” My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire, etc etc and Do you know one thing,

My wife NEVER, EVER objects to any of these”…………!!!!!!

Life rocks in hostel !

Sweet smell of butter filling the surroundings, sound of bullets in the background along with the pops of popcorn, coffee sizzling and the sweet aroma filling the room, such is the environment in A 709 of Symbiosis Infotech Campus at 1 AM.

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Just to simplify all the above we had Public Enemy running on a 20 inch LCD along with some office apps running  on the Mini*, popcorn being popped for the late night movie in Gajju’s innovative and multipurpose kettle, along with sizzling hot coffee and butter bite cookies.

The life in A 709 starts after 12 AM when we return after wasting out whole day in classes or workshops along with a couple of utilized hours in gym and swimming pool. If it hadn’t been for these two hours we would have been dead. Someone truly called this place home away from home [I would have given the due credit but I’m sorry that I forgot the name of the gentleman].

As it seem from the above text that we are so busy studying but it’s not at all that way. More than half of our classes get cancelled, presentations postponed and evaluations delayed. We get a hell lot of time to enjoy but only a few smart people are aware of the ways to make the most of these hours. Whether it’s a quick game of Table Tennis, Basketball, Volley Ball, a mini Cricket match or an hour’s sneak peek into the gym or the swimming pool.

The few of us who have always thought of this place as a home really feel like at home on a long vacation. There are no worries about getting up late for the classes or missing an evaluation or two. Everything is manageable because we are management students and at least this much is expected from us. Those who thought that we are wasting our parents’ hard earned money are morons because they are wasting their time thinking about us while we have fun, we who don’t matter to them in any way.

Old golden days… Cheating at School…

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Get advance copies of the exam
• break into professor’s office
• hack into professor’s computer
• bribe copyist
• bribe TA
• consult test banks (most commonly maintained by fraternities and sororities). These are copies of tests gained either legally from professors who let students keep tests (this one is not cheating – it’s the prof s fault for repeating questions), or illegally by people who don’t turn tests back in or take an extra copy while it’s being passed out.
• if there is more than one section of the class, interview people who took the test in an earlier section. You could bribe several people to each memorize just a few questions and then get together to reconstruct the whole thing after the exam-worthwhile if you share the answers (and cost) with others.
• pay for exam answers from someone else who does any of the above.

Copying from neighbors’ papers
• Sit next to the person you want to cheat from. If there are different versions of the test, either mix them up while they’re being passed out (so you and your seatmate end up with the same version) or sit diagonally behind the person you want to cheat from.
• Several people can cheat by sitting in a “Flying V” formation, where the person to be cheated from sits at the head of the V and the cheaters fan out behind in diagonals.
• You or someone else can “accidentally” drop a paper on the floor so someone else can look at it.
• Walk up to the front to ask the professor a question and peek at other people’s tests on the way up and back.
• Use a small mirror to “adjust contact lenses” while really using it to peek.

Crib sheets

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Students have devised a wide variety of places to hide cheat sheets.
• Desk/Chair: the night before, write the crib sheet on the desk you’ll use. Either write in pencil (hard to see, easy to erase) or whittle an eraser to a point and write using the eraser. You could also write in on the back of the chair in front of you (if you’re bold enough, you can do this on the day of the exam after you sit down), the floor, or the desk edge. One anecdote tells of a female student who wrote her crib notes on the edge of the desk where her breasts would obscure them as she hunched over her exam.
• Food/Drink: Bring a bottled water or soda into class with you- the kind that has an easily pealed off paper around it like Cherry Coke. Before going to the class, write the cheats on the liner, and reattach it FIRMLY to the bottle. Any time you need an answer, take a drink of your soda and you will see some answers. Do NOT do this with a clear or light colored beverage! (NOTE: other mentions of hiding crib sheets in food items are common: in chip or cookie packages, computer-printed fake labels, a piece of tracing paper inside a gum wrapper that gets chewed with the gum after it’s used).

Body Parts

• Hands/Arms: the old standby! Write on your hands or arms and hide it from the professor with hand position or sleeves. The webbing between the fingers is a good place.
• Ankles: cross your leg over your knee and pull down your sock to view.
• Legs: Make a crib sheet with all the important information from the class, or you can write the information on your thighs. If you use the crib sheet tape it to the inside of the part of your skirt that covers your behind. Every time you need some information just lift the front of your skirt enough so you can see the crib sheet and whatever information you need. Anyway, the nice thing is that the instructor can’t really do anything, because if they accuse you of cheating by this method you can always call the instructor a “pervert.” The odds of the instructor reporting a cheating incident like this are pretty slim because the administration will ask, “How did you determine that she was cheating?” What would they say? Whatever they say, though it is true, will make them look like some lowlife child molester, and who wants that?
• Fingernails: I used to use mechanical pencils to write on my bare fingernails. Formulas, verbs, quotes, you name it, and I wrote it on my nails! If the teacher came by, I would curl my fingers under or put my hand in my lap. If worse comes to worse, you can rub off any evidence with one swipe of a sweaty (or spitty) fingertip. Females also report writing crib notes on the underside of false fingernails before attaching them.

Clothing
• Shoes: Write some facts on the bottom of your shoes.
• Hat: Hat: write notes on it in pencil to read during the test while your head is down. The teacher can’t see your eyes looking up at your visor because the visor blocks their view. The pencil then erases or rubs off rather easily so that you can wear it on non-test days, too, to throw off suspicion.
• Shirt: Wear an open flannel shirt to school. Have answers secretly taped to the inside, and when the teacher isn’t looking, just open it just enough to seethe notes. Or use a “cheating shirt”-a tiedyed or other print shirt with information worked into the designs.
• Tie: Write all important notes or formulas on the back of your tie
• Belt: tape the cheat sheet inside your belt. Either use a belt that’s too big or you’ll have to un-do it and slide it out during the test.
• Watch: Write a very small crib sheet, one that is about the size of a watch face. Empty the contents out of an old watch and insert the cheat sheet. Wear the watch with the face on the inside of your wrist. Never wear a t-shirt; only wear clothing with long sleeves!
• 101): For tests we have to show ID. Whenever I am going to have a quiz or test or whatever I write info on the back of my id card. Then I lean back and when I lean forward my card plops write on my desk. Just look at the back of your card and copy away. When the test is done just erase it off because the card is plastic,
• Other: eyeglass frames, mirrored sunglass lenses, band-aids…

Pencil/Pen

• Engraved Pencil: Etch them (notes) on a standard #2 pencil (the 6 sided type) with a new sharp razor blade. Don’t etch too deeply. Then, when you need the engraved information just rub your sweaty fingers over the etchings to get some dirt into them so they become visible. It’s virtually undetectable if you only use 3 sides of the pencil, and rotate it when someone is walking by. NOTE: the most elaborate organized cheating scam of all time sold pencils pre-engraved with the answers to standardized tests for up to $9,000 apiece!
• Engraved Pen: Put a pin in a mechanical pencil where the lead is supposed to be (cut the head off of the pin), and carve your cheat notes into the pen(s) you are using for the exam.
• Empty Pen: take a pen that has run out of ink and write your notes on a sheet of paper. The paper becomes a “scratch sheet” for the test, and you can view the writing by looking at the paper from the proper angle.
• White-Out: write on your “scratch” paper with white ink or White-Out error correction fluid.
• Fluorescent Pen: Student writes on “blank” blue book or scratch paper with invisible ink — visible only when ultraviolet light is shined on it. Thousands of cheap ultraviolet light pens are sold annually.
• Eraser: write answers on the bottom of the big erasers people use; can also be a method of sharing answers with others wince most professors will let you borrow an eraser from someone else during a test.
• Masking Tape: It’s better to write crib notes on masking tape than to write it on your body, because if they suspect you and it’s written on your body you’re busted! With thin masking tape you’ve at least got a chance to get rid of it because that stuff compresses into a ball that’s impossible to unwrap.
• Tissue: write your crib notes in pencil on a tissue. If the professor starts to come by, blow your nose into it and wad it up. If you can’t blow your nose, spit into it so it looks like you’ve blown your nose (gross!) and wads together permanently.
• Sticky Film: Use a good Laser printer to print your cheat notes using a very small font size (2-4). This way you can print off a lot of notes in a small area. You can buy transparent sticky film for laser printers. a transparency sheet, and if you print your cheat notes on these ‘stickies’ you can stick them on your tools: calculators, erasers, rulers, etc. If you have a black pen or calculator, the transparent film will not be noticeable since they are clear and the laser toner is black. You can read the text when the light shines on it the right way.
• The Room: write coded information on posters, blackboard, podium, in dust on cabinets, etc.
• Note Card + Rubber Band: write your notes on an index card. Punch a hole in the comer and thread a rubber band through the hole. Safety pin the non-card end up your sleeve and pull the other end down (the one with the card) and loop it around your thumb. Conceal the cheat sheett in your palm. Just in case the professor comes to check, simply release the band which is around your thumb and it will spring back up inside your sleeve! Only make sure you have all the information you need because once it’s released you can’t access it again!” NOTE: other students claim the cards can be retrieved at will.
• Cover Your Crib Sheet Tracks: write crib notes in a way that can be erased or obliterated immediately. If you must write them in pen, carry an alcohol prep pad or soak a moist towelette in fingernail polish.

Using Technology to Cheat

• Calculator: programmable calculators can hold text, formulas, even pictures.
• Watch: “data bank” watches can hold crib notes
• Pager: Setting electronic pagers to store messages students can conveniently call up when the teacher’s not looking. In one variant, a high-tech student used a tiny wireless video camera in a hat to transmit images of the test to an accomplice, who sent pager messages (the pager set on vibrate) to indicate answers! A related story regard the GRE: people taking it on the East Coast were reportedly beeping answers to persons on the West Coast.
• Palm Pilots and other personal digital assistants (and some calculators, too) allow information to be beamed across a distance via infrared. A student can use a laser pointer (many look like pens) to “write” the answers or as part of a code (e.g., left top side of floor tile = “A” , right top = “B”, etc.
• Walkman: record your notes, take a Walkman to class and listen to it during the test. It helps to have some music on their so if the prof walks towards you by the time they get there the music is playing.
• Micro-recorder: used when the same test is delivered in multiple sections; questions are whispered into microphone for later transcription.
• Wireless Monitor: used by musicians, this consists of a body pack transmitter concealed under clothing combined with a small flesh-colored earpiece; the wire is hidden under hair and clothing. A cell phone plus a small earpiece can be used for the same purpose.
• Camera: at least one instance of a student transmitting exam questions via a tiny wireless camera and receiving answers via a wireless monitor has been reported. And a watch that incorporates a digital still camera has already been released in Japan.

Using Old Exams
If the prof gives old tests back, take one from a previous semester and write all over it. Ask what colors of paper they use on tests and make copies of it in those colors. When the prof s not looking, take out the test of the same color, slide it under the real test, and cheat away.

Blue Books
On exams for which you have to bring you own paper or test booklets,. write all the information that you need in and outline form. If an instructor asks you about the outline (though doubtfall) simply explain that it’s a pre writing work to help you organize better for the actual essay or problem. To let you know, I think many people across the country have used this method on bluebook exams. It works, and is very hard to catch, just make sure your teacher doesn’t collect them at the start of the exam, and redistribute them.
Leaving Class
Leaving the test room and getting help (most often, under the pretense of a bathroom break).

Ringers
Convince someone else to take the test for you. If the proctors check IDs, either pay for a fake ID for them or pick someone who resembles you. On test days, they should try to look as much like you as possible. Take the test, but have the ringer sit next to you so you can copy off them. Take the test, but switch papers with the ringer and turn in the ringer’s test instead of your own (they can turn in their test using a fake name, or better yet, steal the test for a test file.

Take a Make-Up
If it’s the night before the test and you still haven’t studied, call the professor and plead illness or a relationship breakup, acting all distraught. Professors cut you more slack if you call them in advance. If you can’t, and you miss the exam, it depends on how strict they are: with some, you can plead your way into a makeup without any proof; with others, you might have to fake a doctor’s note or con your doctor into giving you one. Of course, in the meantime, you’ve interviewed your friends to find out exactly what was on the test (most instructors don’t go to the extra trouble of making out a special make-up test).

Turning In The Exam
• Not handing in the test and later acting all upset because the professor lost it.
• Gleaning answers from turried-in papers or a post-exam solution sheet, then correcting their paper before handing it in.
• Go up to ask a question and distract the professor long enough to snag someone else’s test or answer sheet. Take it back to the desk, copy answers, and turn both in (be sure not to put them back to back in the stack if you can help it). As a variation, if you don’t like the person, change some of their answers to wrong answers!
After The Exam
• Substituting correct solutions for incorrect ones after the graded tests are handed back.

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Collusion
• I sat right behind a girl that I was very good friends with and she had long wavy hair that remained stiff due to hairspray. Come test time I would simply insert my crib sheet into her hair and pull it aside when I needed an answer. I would then lean forward and whisper the answers to her.
• One person goes up to ask a question to the professor, but is really there to distract him/her while others cheat.
• We’d ask good-looking girls to dress really sexy (like short skirts and low-cut shirts) on the day of the exam and sit up front to distract the professor so we could all cheat.
• Cheater sits by window and confederate outside indicates answers.
• The better prepared person creates a cheat sheet for the lesser-prepared person during the exam, then finds a way to deliver it to them (e.g., dropped, written on eraser).
• The confederate takes two answer sheets and places them together, then writes hard enough on the first to leave impressions on the second. They then find a way to share the “blank” sheet with the cheater.
• Your friend fills in two answer sheets, one with your name and one with his. You both wait until that “crunch” where a bunch of people are leaving at once, then he/she turns in both while you leave without turning in yours. If the test requires names to be written, yours is left blank; either you immediately return because you’d “forgotten” to write your name on yours, or just wait — most professors will automatically assigned an unnamed paper to the person missing the exam score.
• If the instructor has you swap tests and grade each other’s tests, make a pact to misgrade each others’ exams.

Communicating in Codes
• The old tap and eat some colored candy routine! On multiple-choice tests, I tap out a number like – — (which I think Lina is trying to say is one tap, then 3 taps, thus 1-3 which becomes 13) is 13 and — —- is 25 you get the drift, really simple. Then the person answering gives the answer by eating an M&M or Skittle, where lets say red=A, blue=B, yellow–C, etc.
• NOTE: there are dozens of codes students have devised: hand position, foot position or foot tapping, test position, noises like clicking of pens, clothing positions, etc.

Badger the Professor
• Go to their office and get them to change your grade. You have to find out what works for the individual professor — with some, it’s being sexy, for others it’s being nice, or crying, or just being a pain in the ass long enough so they’ll give in just to get rid of you.

Alter Records
• Hack into their computer
• Change their gradebook
• Steal their gradebook
• Steal the exams before grades are entered

If You’re Caught
o Deny, Deny, Deny: Never admit cheating — ever! Invent a plausible story. If you stick to your story, say it enough times with enough conviction and emotion, they’ll start to doubt themselves. Once they doubt, their conscience will bother them: after all, what if they’re making a mistake when a mistake could ruin someone’s life?
o Badger: Go to their office to plead your case and don’t take no for an answer — don’t leave their office until they give in. Most people won’t call the police on you, so keep saying you’re going to leave but don’t leave. Eventually, most profs get frustrated and figure it’s not worth the effort.
o Squeaky Wheel: if you raise a big enough stink far enough up the line, they’ll cave in because it’s not worth the trouble. And if they don’t, their boss or their boss’s boss will.
o Ignorance: If possible, say you didn’t know it was wrong.
o Remorse: if the evidence is really against you, cry uncontrollably. Sob about how one small mistake will ruin your whole life and your family’s lives.
o Not on the Syllabus: argue that since it wasn’t specifically prohibited on the syllabus, it wasn’t prohibited.

If All Else Fails…

Get to be friends with the instructor. Students have even been known to sleep with the instructor, sell dope to the instructor, or even blackmail, frame, or unjustly accuse the instructor.

Disclaimer: We are not to be held responsible for any consequenses. This is just for fun and not to be tested in real life.

Success needs Breaks;)

Think Big: Remember, success always comes to those who really want to succeed in life. So, don’t be afraid to think big. And then, plan ahead to achieve all that you are dreaming of.

Plan your career: A lot of people keep cribbing about how success keeps eluding them. The most common reason they cite is that their boss is not helping them succeed. However, the problem is most people don’t spend much time in analyzing which direction their career has taken and if it is running on track.

It is very easy to lose sight of your goal and the path you need to tread on. Sit down and chalk out a fresh career plan. Where am I? And, where do I want to reach in X number of years? Only you can decide on that and execute it. But if you truly think that your senior is the reason for you not reaching where you want to be, then communicate and clear the air.

Be Bold: Learn to face challenges. Some may prove to be tough obstacles right upfront, while others may not be so straight forward. But a true go-getter is a person who can take on whatever is dished out to him/her of you have any issues with your colleagues, be bold enough to raise them and clear them out.

Work as you have fun: But it’s just the opposite what most end up doing. So, make sure you’re serious when you sit down to work. Enjoy the weekends and work hard during the week. Go for regular outings parties, long drives, etc. Choose something that gives you maximum fun on your day off and come back rejuvenated.

If you think you deserve more, make sure you demand it. Most employees lose out on getting good salaries and desired posts because they never open their mouths. Communicate what you think should be yours and let your work justify the need.

Take a break:

You can’t possibly work 9 to 5 without a break, so don’t pretend yourselves and us. Work Life can be quite a drab if you don’t take time off during the day to unwind and break-free. And it is not about just going to wash room or coffee break. Be a little more creative and you will find a host of breaks staring you in the force. Indulge in them and you will find yourself staying light years away from stress.

Recreations break: Most companies these days have a recreation room well equipped with a carrom board, table tennis, pool table etc. Make it a point to spend at least half-an-hour there. If you do not have a recreation room at your office, try alternative ways of unwinding. Log on to www.shockwave.com,www.orangeshark.com Yahoo / MSN Games or check out http://midday.com/crosswords/index.htm. Or pick up a newspaper for the cartoon strips.

Wash room Break: Don’t underestimate the efficacy of one. Whether it is to catch up on your afternoon siesta or to enjoy your own space, a loo break can do wonders. Even 2-3 minutes away from the maddening crowd at work is enough, it eases frayed eves.

Lunch break: Doesn’t matter what’s in your Tiffin box, half-an-hour away from work with your colleagues can really charge you up. Just make sure you don’t discuss work. Discussing colleagues is allowed though. In fact, you might have already found out that it is quite therapeutic.

Coffee break: If you want to distress coffee is the thing for you. It makes for a great gossip drink and also has the potential of keeping your eyeballs open. Moreover, you can take this break as often as you want.

Ideation break: If you are in the creative line, you need this break. Turn on your favorite music and spend a good 15 minutes thinking of ideas and developing them. If you are not the creative type, plan your day or week ahead.

My Cool Collection

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I have always wanted to have a cool collection of cool T shirts… So far so good. Following is a part of my collection which have been bought from various sources like Bluebustees, Street Shops, Malls, Loot mart etc… etc…  and a new latest avenue known as the Sheepstop. The latest entries in my collection are the ones by Sheepstop. These are good T shirts and also feel good too… Organic Cotton aha… Dont know what it is but feels good to wear 🙂

You know you are at SCIT when… by Jassi

You know you are in when…

1. Classes start at 7 in the morning, you skip bath and more importantly you skip your breakfast, rush full swing, forget to carry your notebook along and somehow manage to reach at 7:25 only to find that the class has been cancelled / postponed.
You sigh for a moment and then mutter BC.

2. Once in a blue moon you make a visit to the notice-board with the hope of finding a note saying something about holidays, what you find instead is the time-table fluffing you with the horrible timing of the classes 7-10, 12-2, 5-7.
Makes you wonder if that’s their optimum time-utilization algorithm or a conspiracy to keep students’ asses stuck to the campus.

3. You have more batch-meets than the lectures. And the same old Gyaan (read: shit) is repeated in all of them.
Peculiarly, all batch-meets set-out with a scary notion of mandatory attendance.

4. Class is going on, you peep-out from the window to see pretty ladies playing basket-ball. You feel the urge to jump out of the window but couldn’t gather the balls. You start fantasizing, and the teacher asks you to explain what he had just explicated.

5. You find no time to eat or to sleep; but there’s always enough time to watch an episode of “Prison Break” or “F.R.I.E.N.D.S” or to catch-up a movie.

6. Every pretty girl you see on the campus turns out to be either from SIIB or from SCMHRD.

7. Dinner menu at the mess may flash Chicken Masala or Chicken Tawa or Chicken Hariyali or Chicken Whatever; the taste is ditto.

8. 90% of the teachers that teach you are the alumni of SCIT itself. The rest 10% couldn’t find a job elsewhere.

9. You find more committees than the committee-members.

10. The only time pupils are seen in formals is either when there’s a GL or a company is visiting for interns / placement.
No wonder why this phenomenon is rare.

11. The one who copied the assignment gets more marks than the one who devised it.

12. SCIT conceives in the idea of “No books”. SCITians believes (have to) that “Google is God and Googling is worship”.

13. You see Romeos and Juliets cuddling around cozily in the college buses.
Their motto: Tel lagaye duniya, hum bajayenge harmuniya :X

14. The answer sheet in the exams compels you to answer a 10 marks question in barely half a page, and a 5 marks question to answer in 2 full length pages.

15. Sachin hits a century and you hear screams all around “Mighty Mighty SCIT”.

by Jaswinder